Skin cancer: serious. The protective hat? Not so much ...

By Mike Gruss
The Virginian-Pilot
? July 28, 2012

That bright thing in the sky is the sun.

And that giant thing obstructing you from seeing the sun, a sort of man-made eclipse? That's my hat.

I am sorry. I regret to inform you: I have become a giant hat person.

It is big. It is round. It is sombrero-like. There are rings of Saturn smaller than my hat. Small airplanes could land on its brim. Next week, stop by after 1 p.m. for a free frappuccino because a Starbucks is thinking of opening there.

The giant hat, ordinarily reserved for cowboys and Indiana Jones and the mariachi band that sometimes plays your favorite Mexican restaurant, is new this summer. And already I feel like I am years late in joining this exclusive club.

The Centers for Disease Control suggests in nearly every bit of paperwork to wear a hat with a wide brim to help prevent skin cancer. Studies have found a hat also keeps ticks at bay.

Skin cancer among young adults is on the rise. More than 50 percent of those ages 18 to 39 report having a sunburn in the past year. (And by my own experience, that sounds ridiculously low.) Sunburns, unfortunately, are not unusual. For me, they're as frequent as pizza on a Friday night.

This summer, the temperature has been unrelenting. Again. And if you believe - like I do - that this weather is not some kind of statistical anomaly, well, get used to it. And then get used to my giant wide-brimmed hat.

Better yet, get your own. The wide-brim hat is here to stay. It's the hat of the future.

Mine is beige. Khaki if you must. I bought it last year on sale from the clearance rack at REI. It is floppy and washable. I have a giant noggin, and it fits nicely.

I am fair-skinned, not quite translucent, but more like an unmuddied baseball. I generously apply sunscreen, but it washes off, rinses off, sweats off. It can be hard to remember. Turtlenecks seemed impractical. So I converted to the Wild West look. I wear a hat.

Do I look ridiculous? Yup.So much of my face is in the shadows I might as well be Batman.

But look again. Instead, see me as an adventurer off to explore untamed lawns and carefully curated beachs. By the squint in my eyes, you can tell that I am staring off into the great vast wilderness of Hampton Roads, into some baseball game in the park, some fire pit waiting for a party, some beer that needs a koozie.

Look again and I am a cowboy wrasslin' with a grocery bag from the back seat, oblivious to an unforgiving and blistering sun.

Look again, and one of my neighbors is asking: "Mike, why's your hat so big? Does that thing get DirecTV?"

Laugh now, kemosabe. You have seen my kind. Pale. And in a hat. Not just at the beach, but in the yard, at your party, walking the dog, even strolling indoors past a large window.

Is it embarrassing to wear a giant hat instead of, say, a cap that mentions my favorite team? Sure. Have I heard the taunts from those who want to see my skin turn a pinkish strawberry color? Undoubtedly.

"Enjoy the safari, Grusser!" their eyes scream when I'm walking the 10 feet to the mailbox. Or, "Are you going to the Kentucky Derby?" - to which my eyes yell back, "I will see creatures of which you cannot even fathom when you are dead from cancer!"

We must accept the wide-brim hat just like we accept rolled-up short sleeves that highlight your tattoos. It is a staple of modern fashion. And safety.

I wear my hat today in hopes of looking ridiculous again tomorrow.

Mike Gruss, 757-446-2277, mike.gruss@pilotonline.com, PilotOnline.com/gruss

Source: http://hamptonroads.com/2012/07/skin-cancer-serious-protective-hat-not-so-much

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